Despair's Desire
by Glasya
Summary: A demon gets stuck in Setsuna's body and its up to jealous Serena to do something


Despair's Desire  
  
"Why does she hide her own feelings from others? even her closest friends dont know of these feelings that stain her once beautiful life. I still cant believe how a person as beautiful as she can become as sad as I once was. But yet I have gotten better but she still uses that elegant smile to hide behind. It is like a mask. It is I, who must free her from this life so she will no longer have to hide behind this mask and be as free as I am now."  
  
I was informed of this soul's saddness by my closest friend. He is more than a friend to me though. he is one of the people who actually understand me, he is both my friend and my partner. My prince who watches over all of us with an exceeding eye. He never misses anything and it is him who I gave my heart to all those years ago. For I am one of the most important people of this kingdom. I am the one who will ascend to the throne after my parents. I am a princess, yes but I wasnt like that afew years ago. I was a regular girl at the ripe age of fifteen. I was into everything that a girl that age was in to, boys and enjoying life. But mostly boys though. But there was one who I never quite understood. But he seemed to give me the wanting feeling to see him again everytime we met. But I always thought of him as a creep. I guess it was because of the name caling. But it is really amazing how life can change so quickly. I am the princess of the moon kingdom that was destroyed by  
an evil like no other. The name still echos in my head, Beryl the one who was responsible for destroying everything I loved. But now I have been given another chance. It's like a miracle for I thought those days would never seem to find me again, all that happiness. But for some reason it has. I am home back on the moon with my prince and all my loyal subjects. But they really arent like that though they are more to me than just subjects in the court, they are my loyal friends who stick by me all the time. Each of them are princesses, and running through their veins is the power of their planets. Each of them is unique and has the powers of all the elements which would be the building blocks of life as one would call them. But alas my story begins here.  
  
My name is Princess Serena of the Moon kingdom, my mother is Queen Serenity and I have no father for he died long ago. I had been returned to my original life with the help of my fellow scouts, my prince and the silver chrystal. But when we had returned the entire place was in ruin. There were no people alive, for it seemed that Beryl had demolished everything and everyone. But again with everyone's help we restored everything even the life of my mother who was encased in a glass coffin in the palace by the few people that werent killed that later migrated to earth. As I approached her, I still remember the peaceful look on her face, she looked like she was sleeping. there were no signs of dacay, it was like she wasnt really dead. But we restored everything and began to live as we did once upon a time.  
  
Everything was like a fairytale. Everyday was full of feasts and endless balls. I dancd so much that at times I felt like my feet would fall off. It was amazing, I never could dance before my mother taught me. And no one called me a flake or a ditz. I was respected and everywhere I went people bowed to me and called me your highness and majesty. It was like a dream. It was even better when my future daughter visited me from the future. On one of the child's visits something was different. She wasnt smiling and she wouldnt tell me what was wrong. It hurt me that she couldnt tell me, for she knew she could always talk to me I told her this many times for we could always talk but something was different. It wasnt about her or me, it was about someone that she really cared about. But that was the problem, she wouldnt tell me who it was. Every time I tried to ask her she told me not to worry and that she was working on it. She left me there in bewilderment. Who was this person  
that Rini was grieving for?  
  
Finally one day I found Rini crying. It upset me so much that she wouldnt tell me anything brought tears to my eyes. "Please tell me Rini, what has been bothering you for so long?" I asked. She stared at me with blank eyes. "Please if you tell me I might be able to help you." "You really think so mommy?" she asked. "Hey its worth a try if it has been bothering you this much. I want you to know that you've been torturing me by keeping this from me. Your my daughter and I love you, and I want you to know that I will always be there if you ever need anything" She smiled weakly at me and wiped her tears. She hugged me and thanked me. We walked up to my room and sat on my huge bed.  
  
"Now tell me, who is it thats had you so up tight?" I asked and put my hand on her shoulder.  
  
"It's Pluto" she said and looked out the window. "Theres something wrong with her."  
  
"Do you know what it is?"  
  
"No she wont tell me, she tells me she's fine and that I shouldnt worry But I've seen her crying alot when she's alone. She seems....sad all the time. And she trys to hide it with her smile."  
  
"So Pluto hasnt been herself lately?"  
  
"No, you should se her it's as if she dying. All the happiness has flown out of her it's as if she's a body that has lost it's soul. It really scares me to see her like this." Rini looked at me again with tears swelling in her eyes. "Do you think you could do something mommy?"  
  
"I'll go talk to her Rini and we'll see what I can do to help her. But I want you to stay here okay?"  
  
"But why?"  
  
"Because I dont want you to feel any worse than you are now and seeing her again might make you feel bad. So I'll go alone and talk to her k?"  
  
"Okay."  
  
"You stay here I'll be back shortly."  
  
I left Rini there in my room and went to my mother's room. Since she wasnt there I went to the gardens and found her admiring the blue roses that had just bloomed.  
  
"A most unusual flower dont you think Serena? It needs no light to bloom and yet it does this so gorgiously. It truely is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."  
  
"Mother I have something to tell you" I said.  
  
"What is it? is something wrong?"  
  
"No I'm just going to see Setsuna. Theres been something wrong with her and it's been bothering Rini so I told her I'd go find out what was bothering her."  
  
"Oh so you need to go to the time gate then?"  
  
"Yes, could you send me there?"  
  
"Ofcourse Serena. If there's something wrong with Setsuna then go find out."  
  
My mother led me to a portal in the palace and told me to go through it and at the other end was the time gate. Time travel was the most amazing thing. I was engulfed in a sea of stars and I seemed to be flying through it all. But it had to end and I came to the small house where Setsuna lived and next to it was the time gate. I walked to the door and knocked. At first there was no answer so I knocked again, still no answer. Suddenly I got very worried. Could something have been terribly wrong with Pluto?  
  
"Pluto I'ts Serena I'm coming in" I said and opened the door. I was surrounded in blackness. The only light in the room was from the doorway inwhich I stood. My eyes strained to get used to the darkness as I looked around the room for any signs of movement. There was nothing but complete stillness and blackness. I got even more worried and a feeling of dred filled my stomach. I felt sick.  
  
"Setsuna?," I called, "are you here?" there was no answer. I groped in the dark for something solid, preferably a wall that I could follow to her room. I finally found one and realized where I was, the living room, her room was down the hall straight ahead. I walked steadily down the hall but suddenly felt light headed and dizzy when I reached her door, it was closed and the feeling in my stomach grew worse. I pushed open the door and fumbled for a light switch. I paused, I could hear breathing, it was harsh and sort of wispy. I finally found a lamp and turned it on. I let out a sigh of relief. There was Setsuna, asleep right there. That explains why she didnt answer the door I thought. I looked at her. She was sweating and her breathing pattern was strange, plus the noises she was making sounded weird. Something wasnt right.  
  
"Setsuna wake up" I said and shook her gently. "Wake up now your scaring me" I said again. She didnt move. I rushed to the bathroom and filled up a glass of cold water then ran back to her room and almost tripped on my own dress because of it's length and because of my rushing. I poured it on her face. Her eyes slowly opened. That wasnt right though, if you poured cold water on a person they would shoot up and yell at you. But she just looked at me with blank eyes.  
  
"Serena?" Setsuna looked puzzled. "Why are you here?"  
  
"To check on you and you dont look too good Setsuna. Whats wrong?" I looked at her with worried eyes.  
  
"I just havent been feeling well."  
  
"You dont look well either."  
  
"But still why are you here?" she asked again.  
  
"Rini told me that you werent yourself and I told her I'd check on you to see if you were okay. And right now I'm glad I came, you look horrible."  
  
"I'll be fine" she closed her eyes.  
  
"Thats what you told Rini and she wasnt impressed. What happened Setsuna? you hardly never get sick."  
  
"I dont know, I just came down with it." I felt her forehead.  
  
"Gosh your burning up Setsuna come home with me and we'll get you an apothecary."  
  
"No I'm okay, really Serena I cant leave the gate unguarded."  
  
"Dont worry, I'll send someone else here to guard it like Amara and Michelle. they can do it while you get better but right now your in no condition to do anything. Get dressed and I'll take you to the palace."  
  
Setsuna tried to get up but fell back on the bed. The virus that she had must have been sapping her strength so I helped her up and over to her closet which I also helped her dress. Then we both fumbled out of the house and out to the portal. I held on to her as we flew through the portal and ended up at the palace. Setsuna had passed out by then and I could barely hold her up since she was bigger and older than me.  
  
"Someone help me!" I cried. "Help!!" Darion heard me and ran to me  
  
"Whats wrong Serena?!" He asked with a look of bewilderment on his face.  
  
"It's Setsuna! she's sick help me carry her to a room!" Ofcourse he carried her on his own. Darion layed her down on the bed and went to get my mother and a doctor. Then the other scouts came in.  
  
"Whats wrong?!" Raye asked. Soon after her question they all asked the same.  
  
"Quite!" I yelled to get them to listen to me. "Listen Setsuna is ill right now and we have to help her. "Amara, Michelle I want you two to go to the time gate to guard it in Setsuna's absence K?"  
  
"Will she be allright?" Michelle asked.  
  
"We'll do all we can to get her better. Believe me Michelle she'll be fine." Amara pulled Michelle out of the room and they headed to the portal to carry out their duties. Afew minutes later Darion returned with a doctor and the Queen.  
  
"Please scouts go wait outside and let the doctor look at her, she'll be fine theres no need to worry" My mother said. But thats when it got worse. Rini walked in and stared at the scouts with worry and fear.  
  
"Whats happened?" she asked. All the scouts cleared a path to look at Rini. She walked through the isle toward the bed and a look of shock swept over her face.  
  
"Pluto!!" she cried and jumped on the bed. "Whats wrong with her?!" she screamed. "Make her better now!!"  
  
Queen Serenity grabbed Rini and tried to comfort her.  
  
"Rini its allright. Pluto will be just fine she just passed out thats all" Serenity said in a gentle voice but it wasnt enough to control Rini's explosion of tears. She looked like a baby there in my mother's arms. She kept saying "Pluto" over and over again. My mother tried to turn so that Rini couldnt look at her but nothing worked, the child always turned somehow to look at Setsuna.  
  
"Serena take Rini outside" my mother finally said. She handed Rini to me and I took her out of the room and shut the door behind me. I sat down in a chair that was in the hall and clutched Rini to myself.  
  
"It's okay Rini, sshhh now its okay, theres no need to cry baby" I said in a hushed voice. But it didnt work. She still cried her heart out. She made me want to cry but I knew that wouldnt help things. I had to be strong for Rini's sake. I looked at the other scouts, they all looked as worried too. But they werent crying. Raye was biting her thumb and Mina had her head in her hands. Amy went inside the room to see if she could help since she was going to be a doctor. Lita stood there in silence but I could tell she was worried. To tell the truth she looked as if she was going to punch something and it was probably going to be the wall. Suddenly I remembered Darion. Where had he gone?  
  
"Darion? where are you?" I called.  
  
"He's in there still" Mina answered.  
  
"Oh I guess I got alittle too worried and forgot where he was" I sighed.  
  
"Thats okay Serena. This doesnt happen normally to Setsuna. She's usually the healthiest of us all" Mina said.  
  
"Yeah but thats whats so weird. Why would she come down with something this serious?" Raye asked.  
  
"It's probably something from the gate" Lita suggested. We all looked at her. "Well something probably came out of the gate and got her sick like a spore or something. Hey it could have been air born" This didnt make Rini feel any better. She let out another wail and sobbed some more on my shirt.  
  
"Lita" I said, "Hush" I pointed to Rini.  
  
"Oh" she said and fell silent.  
  
To me it felt like that silence was never going to break. It felt like we were sitting there for hours. That was hours of listening to Rini cry. Finally the door opened and my mother came out and Rini hushed.  
  
"Serena come here for a second." I handed Rini to Raye and went inside. Setsuna had turned terribly pale, there was no color in her face at all. Beads of sweat were all over her face. Then I heard that sound, the harsh breathing. and I started to get a knot in my stomach. There were all sorts of tubes going in and out of her.  
  
"Is she going to be okay?" I asked. No one answered. Finally Serenity spoke up.  
  
"Thats it Serena, we dont know whats wrong with her. The doctor cant seem to find anything wrong with her except for the high fever and paleness. And her fever seems to be going up."  
  
"Well Lita suggested that something came out of the gate and she caught it" I said.  
  
"That might be whats wrong. But the question is what was it?" Amy asked. "Well her fever's getting worse, we need to get her into the tub and soak her with cold water to bring the fever down" Amy said and started to pick her up.  
  
"Darion could you lift her to the bath tub please?" I asked.  
  
"Sure thing Serena" was all he said and he picked her up and carried Setsuna in the direction of the bathroom. I told the doctor to stay there and I walked into the huge bathroom. Darion set her down on a stool and left . He went outside to tell everyone. I closed the door and the three of us stripped her clothes off her sticky body. Amy turned the bathtub water on cool and my mother put a towel around Setsuna.  
  
"She deserves her privacy" Serenity said and we waited for the tub to fill up.  
  
"Tell me Serena," Amy started, "How was she when you found her?"  
  
"Well when I first got there, there were no lights on and she was in her bed. she was sweating and breathing in that wraspy voice. I tried to wake her up but she wouldnt get up. Then I went to the bathroom to get some cold water to pour on her and I did so. But she didnt pop up or anything. She just opened her eyes and stared blankly at me and asked what was I doing there. But thats whats so weird. When you pour cold water on someone they usually react in shock, but she just opened her eyes. Then she had no strength, she couldnt even get out of bed least of all walk. so I had to help her all the way here but she passed out while going through the portal. And here we are."  
  
"Hmm thats most interesting. Later I'll take a blood sample and run it through my computer and we'll se if that gets us anywhere" Amy said and turned off the water. We lifted Setsuna into the tub and started to soak her with sponges. We poured it on her head and she opened her eyes alittle.  
  
"Your Majesty? what am I..." was all Setsuna said before she passed out again.  
  
"Serena will you go get the thermometer from the other room?" Serenity asked.  
  
"Sure I'll get it." I headed out of the bathroom and walked over to the nightstand beside the bed and grabbed the thermometer. I paused and heard Rini sobbing still. I walked out of the room and saw her in Darion's lap sobbing all over him. I touched her head and she looked up at me. Her cheeks were all red and moist.  
  
"She's going to be fine Rini, I promise you she'll get better" I smiled at her and she smiled weakly back at me.  
  
"How can you be sure?" she asked. I really didnt know how to answer so I said the first thing that came to my mind.  
  
"She's protected by silver chrystal power and by your love Rini. And if you believe she'll get better then she will."  
  
I hugged her once more and went back into the bathroom.  
  
"What took you so long?" Amy asked as I handed her the thermometer.  
  
"Oh I was just talking to Rini. She's still feeling really bad about this"  
  
"She'll be fine," Serenity said, "She should cry herself to sleep soon."  
  
"Huh?" I said.  
  
"You've done it many times Serena. This happens when you cry very hard for a long time like she's doing now." We could hear Rini let out another wail.  
  
"Good news her temperature has gone down to 102 degrees. which is alot better that 105. That was way too high. if we hadnt put her in the bath, her brain would have started to fry" Amy said and put up the thermometer. She put some more cold water into the tub and sat down on the toilet.  
  
"Poor dear" Serenity said. My mother was always a caring and understanding person. She always took pitty on people. But I guess thats what makes her such a good Queen. She was forceful only when she needed to be and kind all the time. But right now I could only think of one person-Rini. I hated to see her suffer so much. I wanted to take away all her pain, but the only way to do that was to save Setsuna and get her better and this was going to be no easy task because not knowing the cause makes it all the more harder to cure. And if Lita was right and this thing was air borne we were all going to get it. And if it was deadly we would all once again see the destruction of the ever great moon kingdom. I sat down on the bench next to my mother.  
  
"Has it gone down any yet?" I asked Amy who was checking Setsuna's temperature again.  
  
"Yes its gone down to 99 degrees. Thats almost normal but how long will it stay down before it bounces" she said. "Lets take her out of the tub and get her back into bed."  
  
We finally got Setsuna into some clean clothes and into bed. Since there was nothing the doctor could do he left and Amy sat at her bedside and changed the cloth that was on her head. My mother left to deal with other matters. But everyone was still waiting outside the room. I figured I'd fill them in. I walked out of the room and everyones eyes were on me except for Rini who had fallen asleep.  
  
"Well Setsuna does seem to be feeling better but she's still unconcious. Her fever went from 105 to 99 degrees which is good and she's sleeping peacefully."  
  
"So is she" Dario said. "Come on lets put her to bed, its late." He stood up and we walked to her room. At first there was silence between us.  
  
"Well do you think Setsuna will get better?" he asked me finally.  
  
"I really dont know, its hard to tell. She's still alittle pale and slightly feverish but she did open her eyes when she was in the tub."  
  
"Really? what did she say?"  
  
"Your majesty what am I, then she passed out again."  
  
"Thats it huh?"  
  
"Yeah, but its so weird though, she hardly never gets sick. its probably something from the gate. But Amara and Michelle are there to guard it in Setsuna's absence." We walked into her room and I put her night gown on and tucked her in. I just sat there on her bed.  
  
"Serena arent you coming?" Darion asked.  
  
"No I dont want to leave her."  
  
"Very well then I've got some business to take care of so I'll see you tomorrow then." He kissed Rini on the forehead then me and said goodnight and walked out of the room. I crawled under the covers and stared at Rini. She looked so peaceful. I smiled and looked out the window to see earth. Memories flooded my head of the life I left behind. My thoughts were interrupted by a scream. I jumped up. Setsuna. I hopped out of bed and ran down the halls toward Setsuna's room. I rushed into the room and saw Amy frantically trying to hold down Setsuna who was popping up and down on the bed. Suddenly her voice changed to a deep voice that wasnt hers it sounded like a demon's or something that was not of this world.  
  
"Setsuna!!!" I screamed and ran to her. I called her name over and over then the voice answered.  
  
"There is no Setsuna!! Let me go!!"  
  
"No!!! never Setsuna!!!" I cried.  
  
"Serena!! somethings inside her!!" Amy cried. "We need to restrain her!!"  
  
I couldnt think, my mind went blank and I grabbed a vase and smashed it over her head before I knew I had done it.  
  
"Oh my god!" I cried after I realised what I had done.  
  
"Its okay Serena she stopped" Amy said and slumped down in the chair and let out a sigh.  
  
"There's something in her that has taken over her body. But what is it?" I asked.  
  
"It has to be a demon of some sort its the only thing I can think of. With that voice it has to be some sort of demon. Go wake up the others and bring them here Serena."  
  
"Right! I'll be right back." I ran down the hall. I passed Mina's room without notice. I stopped short and ran back the other way and barged into her room.  
  
"Mina wake up!!"  
  
"What is is? do you know what time it is?"  
  
"We know whats wrong with Pluto!"  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes! go to her room now!"  
  
"I'm coming."  
  
I ran out of her room and headed towards Lita's. I did the same thing as I'd done to Mina.  
  
"Lita wake up!!"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"We know whats wrong with Pluto! hurry up and go to her room now!" I ran out of her room and headed towards Raye. I ran into her room.  
  
"Raye get up!! we know whats wrong with Pluto!!!"  
  
"What?!" she popped up. I grabbed her and pulled her out of bed and we raced down the hall to Setsuna's room.  
  
"Whats going on?" Raye asked.  
  
"We;ve found out whats wrong with Setsuna"Amy answered. Serenity walked in.  
  
"Whats all the yelling about?" she asked.  
  
"We know whats wrong with Trista" Lita said.  
  
"Oh?"  
  
"Yes," Amy answered, "Somehow a demon of some sort escaped from the time gate and got inside her. Setsuna's body cant handle two people living in her so her body is starting to shut down."  
  
"Shut down?! you mean die?!" I yelled.  
  
"Yes Serena" Amy answered. "I've taken a blood sample its not in the data base of my computer. Not even Luna could identify the demon."  
  
"Yes so what ever is in her we must get it out by force. This creature is trying to take over her body and thats why shes been so sick. Its killing her slowly but surely so we're on a limited time schedule" Luna said.  
  
"Well how can we force the demon out of her?" Raye asked.  
  
"And without hurting Setsuna?" Mina continued.  
  
"Thats the question but it's going to take all of us to get it out then destroy it" Amy said.  
  
"Well whatever you all do you must do it fast. That thing is taking over her internal body and is killing her cells" Serenity added.  
  
"So in other words it's like a virus?" Lita asked.  
  
"More like a disease" Serenity answered.  
  
I just stood there and took it all in. If Pluto was to die it would break her heart and I couldnt let that happen.  
  
"We've got to do this fast!" I yelled. They all looked at me. "Think of Rini!  
  
if we dont save Pluto and she dies it will kill Rini too."  
  
"No it wont" Raye answered.  
  
"Yes! it will, with Pluto a piece or Rini's happiness will die thats one less smile we will see, one less everything. She would be like a lifeless statue. Because who helped her when she was alone?! it was Pluto!! and Pluto means more to Rini than anything!!" I paused. "Anything. Even, even me. Does Rini love Pluto more than her own mother?" My knees felt weak and I collapsed. My friends rushed to me. "No!!! go away please! I dont want any help." I got up and ran out of that room I ran hard and fast. It was as if Pluto was her mom instead of me. I didnt want to stop running I wanted to run right into space and never stop. But something held me back.  
  
"Who is it? who is this person that is holding me back from just leaving?" I said aloud. "Darion? is it Darion? But even he doesnt seem to love me anymore! All the people I love have grown distant from me!! even my mother!!" I started to run again. I ran to a grove that was almost out of sight from the palace. I collapsed again and started to cry. I felt like there was someone else there with me.  
  
"Whose there?" I asked. A fairy with purple and blue hair appeared.  
  
"Why are you crying" she asked in a soft voice.  
  
"My world is falling apart."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because, because of Setsuna, Sailor Pluto, Rini's new mother. It's as if she didnt want me for her mother anymore, that she'd rather have Pluto. But if Pluto dies Rini's heart will break. So I..." I heard them. My friends were calling my name. Their voices were very faint but I could hear them. They called my name over and over again. I regognized one voice. Rini. She was looking for me. But I didnt care. I didnt want to go back. Fairies appeared around me. They were beautiful and magical. They hardly appeared. So this was neat that I was actually talking to them, several of them.  
  
"Why dont you go back?" one asked.  
  
"Your place is with them" another said.  
  
"I dont care I dont want to be with them. It's as if they didnt want me" I said.  
  
"But why do they search for you if they care not for you?" The purple haired one said. "Your place is with them."  
  
"I already lived this life. It was supposed to end life wanted it to end, so it did and I was sent to earth to live again. But now I'm back here again. This is not supposed to be. I am supposed to be living on earth with mom and dad and Sammy, thats where I belong."  
  
"But do you not like it here? on earth you were treated poorly and here your treated with respect and you are adored by everyone" she said.  
  
"Everyone except my own daughter and family" I answered.  
  
"If you daughter cares not for you why does she look the hardest of all your friends?" a yellow haired fairy asked.  
  
"Look she cries for you" one said.  
  
"She feels that you love her not" the blue haired one said.  
  
"It seems you both need to show your love to eachother. For you both feel that you dont love eachother. Look she cries over your absence" the fairy made a bubble and I looked onside it. I saw Rini crying on my bed. I started to cry.  
  
"But I dont want to go back! I dont feel loved anywhere!" I screamed.  
  
"Then bring her here we shall. You both need to comfirm your love for eachother." The fairies moved their hands and trails of glitter headed toward the palace. they floated right into my room and fell on Rini's face. She popped up and ran to the balcony. She looked over in my direction then disappeared backinto the palace. Afew minutes later I could see her running in my direction. But I didnt want to move to go see her it was as if I was paralyzed, with fear for I was scared that if she came any closer I would draw farther away and she would draw closer to Pluto. It was then that I decided not to help Pluto. Rini should learn to except life and learn who her real mother was. Me. Wait a minute, I thought, why am I being so selfish? I want whats best for Rini right? so I should help Pluto. But by doing that Rini grows closer to her and more distant from me I shouldnt help her I wont why am I having an emotional debate with myself? Just dont help her Serena. Rini is your  
daughter not Pluto's. They should just be friends. Rini was getting closer.  
  
"I wont help her" I finally said after my debate. "I've made up my mind. If Pluto dies, she dies oh well that way Rini can be closer to me and forget about her. But what about all the things Pluto did for Rini?" I was having another debate but it felt like a nervous breakdown. I liked the feeling of simply melting away from everything. That feeling was starting to overwhelme my body. The fairies disappeared into complete blackness but I still saw Rini coming toward me. she finally reached me and I didnt see her anymore.  
  
"Mama!! wake up!! please wake up!" Rini cried. I opened my eyes and looked at her with blank eyes. It was my turn to act all scared. Everyone else had had their problems now it was my turn. It was my turn to be in the hour of need. This was just what I wanted. To steale all the attention. Pluto could be replaced. But not the princess! No one could replace me. Serenity only had one child, me- the air to the throne. I blacked out again. When I awoke I was in my room. But I didnt open my eyes I didnt want to. Until finally I couldnt take the darkness aymore. I slowly opened my eyes. I tried to sit up but my head swirled with pain so I layed back down. I heard the door open. I looked through the corner of my eye to see who it was. Darion. Did he actually care? he walked over to the bedside and stroked my face. I heard him start to cry. I felt really bad but good and opened my eyes and stared into his.  
  
"Serena" he said, "Your okay."  
  
"Yeah I'm fine" I tried to sit up but that enormous migrane like pain came back. "Mostly."  
  
"Mostly?"  
  
"I've got a killer headache."  
  
"You know you really scared me Serena. You scared everyone. I was really worried that you might have done something horrible."  
  
"Like?"  
  
"You know."  
  
"You think I'd do that?"  
  
"I dont know Serena. All this pressure has taken alot out of you. I want you to stay in bed K?"  
  
"Why? what about Pluto?" those mixed feelings came back. They made my head pound even more than it was. It was too much. I grabbed my head with my hands and yelled in pain.  
  
"Serena whats wrong?!" Darion yelled.  
  
"My head!" I cried. "So many thoughts and emotions I cant..." I fell unconcious.  
  
The next time I woke up I saw Darion hovering over me with concerned eyes.  
  
"Serena?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Are you... okay?"  
  
"What do you mean okay?"  
  
"Well you passed out five hours age from a massive headache."  
  
I tried to sit up and that pain came back.  
  
"Argh" I said and grabbed my head.  
  
"Serena?" Darion said again. "Are you? I want you to stay lying down until you get better K?"  
  
"Why? what about Pluto?" I asked.  
  
"The others will take care of her but theres someone here to see you. She's been just as worried as I have." Darion left the room and came back with Rini.  
  
"Oh mommy whats wrong with you?" she asked.  
  
"I...dont know Rini" I answered.  
  
"You've got to get better so you can help us fight the demon in Pluto" she cried.  
  
"No honey mama wont be doing anything right now she cant even get out of bed" Darion told her.  
  
"Darion, has my mother come in yet?" I asked him.  
  
"Uh yeah she wanted me to get her when you woke up."  
  
"How did her voice sound?" I asked.  
  
"What? what do you mean?"  
  
"Did she sound worried, confused mad? what?"  
  
"Uh she sounded more worried and scared than anything else. Why do you ask?"  
  
"I just wanted to know ."  
  
"Mommy are you feeling allright?" Rini asked. "We have to save Pluto."  
  
"Is that all you care about? Pluto? do you care about Pluto more than your own mom? because thats all you seem to care about right now."  
  
"I see" Darion pipped up. "You both need to learn of your love for eachother right now. I get it, thats why you ran away Serena. You think Rini loves Pluto more than you. So you ran away because you were jealous of Pluto for taking Rini and you dont want to help save Pluto because it Pluto dies Rini can be closer to you but you said if Pluto dies so will a piece of Rini so your debating in your mind whether or not you should help save Pluto."  
  
"Yes. I dont want Pluto to steal Rini away from me because she is my daughter and I dont want to lose her to that woman. So I'm pretty much stuck."  
  
"Mommy?" Rini looked at me with ine of her many faces of confusion. "Mommy you dont think I love you? How could you think that?"  
  
"I... well you seem to be happier with Pluto so I thought you might love her more than me."  
  
"No" Rini smiled at me. I was the one who was confused now. "No one could ever take your place mama."  
  
"So you dont love Pluto more than me?"  
  
"Ofcourse not!" She threw her arms around me. "No one can be my mother but you. Pluto is my friend,nothing more. Where did you get that idea?"  
  
"I dont remember. But I'm glad."  
  
"Glad about what?" she asked.  
  
"That I am able to see your smile instead of your tears" I smiled at her and hugged her again. "The fairies were right."  
  
"I saw them they are so pretty" Rini said and crawled up beside me. Darion slipped in on the other side of Rini. She closed her eyes and soon fell asleep. I scooted closer to Rini and looked past her at Darion.  
  
"Welcome home" he said, "It's good to see you again."  
  
"It's good to be seen" I replied. I closed my eyes and soon fell asleep.  
  
When I woke up the sun was shining into my window. I looked beside me, both Darion and Rini were gone.  
  
"Rini? Darion?" I called out.  
  
"They are not here Serena" My mother said. She walked in from the balcony.  
  
"Where,where are they?" I asked.  
  
"Tending to Setsuna." She walked over to my bed and sat down.  
  
"How is she?"  
  
"Worse. But I'm not worried about her right now. It's you."  
  
"Me? whats wrong with me?" this was getting so confusing to me.  
  
"Serena, you are going through an emotional crisis right now and you dont know how to handle it so your head is straining to think up an answer but you are also listening to your heart. So in other words your confused."  
  
"You got that right. What should I do? Which one should I listen to?" I asked.  
  
"I dont know. But I will tell you this, Dont sacrifice." She kissed my forehead and left the room.  
  
"Mother!" I got out of bed despite the pain that started to swell in my head. "Where's Rini?"  
  
"Searching for an answer as well."  
  
"Mother where is she?"  
  
"She is with Setsuna."  
  
"Thank you mother."  
  
I rushed down the hall but everything got blurry and I felt dizzy. I tried to grab onto something to steady myself but I couldnt grab anything. So I fell. I put my hand on my head but the pain wouldnt go away. I was almost there. I pulled myself up and worked my way down the hall. I heard screams-Pluto. That demon was at work again. I finally reached the room and all the scouts were holding Setsuna down from bouncing off the bed.  
  
"Whats going on?" I said in a hushed voice. I felt as if my strength was fading with everystep I took.  
  
"Serena we need to get this thing out of her now!! we're out of time!" Amy yelled.  
  
"Right. Moon Cosmic Power!!!!!" I started my transformation into sailor moon. I thought it would give me strength but it got worse. I almost collapsed there but I held myself up.  
  
"Lets do it!" Lita yelled. "Jupiter Star Power!!!!!"  
  
"Mars Star Power!!!!"  
  
"Mercury Star Power!!!!!"  
  
Venus Star Power!!!!!"  
  
"Moon Prism Power!!!!"  
  
They all transformed into their planet powers and let Setsuna go. She jumped out the window snd the other scouts followed, even Rini. All  
  
except for me. I barely got to the window to see them fighting Pluto. She had transformed into Sailor Pluto. I jumped out the window and landed on my feet but fell back and landed on my butt.  
  
"Sailor Moon!!!" Mars yelled, "Come help us!"  
  
"I'm trying!!" I struggled to get up and walked over to them  
  
"Moon Princess elimination!!" I yelled andtried to blast the monster out of her. It was starting to work. All I had to do was hold the wand. But that was the hard part. I could barely stand let alone hold the wand long enough. But I had to do this. I could feel my friends eyes on me but I didnt look at them I looked straight ahead at the helpless girl that stood there. She was like a lifeless body but I could make her better. She would no longer need to hide herself and her feelings behind her smile.  
  
"I am doing this for Rini. She would be sad if I didnt do anything and I promised her. I held the wand with a tighter grip. then the debate of whether I should be doing this started up again. That awful pain swirled around in my head and it started to pound. I screamed. I couldnt help it. I just screamed. That was when the demon came out of Setsuna and I dropped the wand.  
  
"Sailor Moon!" Darion jumped down from the balcony andran to me. "Serena are you allright?!" you look so...so weak."  
  
"I feel that way I cant seem to regain any of it. I feel like my every movement is draining me."  
  
"Scouts!! hold him off for now!!!" Darion yelled and he pickedme up and jumped up to the balcony.  
  
"Your to weak to fight stay here" was all Darion said before he jumped off the balcony.  
  
"No I cant sit here Darion." I pulled myself out of the bed and made my way to the balcony. I couldnt believe what I was seeing It was a demon.  
  
"Amy was right." It was attacking all of them. Even Pluto couldnt do anything. She was just lying there she looked like she was dead. Was I too late? Icouldnt tell the other scouts were there as well, Neptune andUranus. I guess mother had sent for them to help us fight. But I was the only one who could stop it but I was too weak! I hated this Even Rini was fighting but not me. I forced myself off the balcony and landed on my feet but they started to sting and I couldnt shake it off so I headed toward the battle.  
  
"Stop right there!!!" I yelled. "Its cruel that such a great thing as the time gate could harbor an evil thing like you. you've caused enough trouble here and it's time I put an end to you! because your not welcome here!" I walked toward it.  
  
"Who are you anyway?"  
  
"I am Despair's desire" it answered.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I use pain and suffering for my own desires so I was given the name Despair's Desire. I am the Lord of Despair, a servant to the arch devil himself.and I desire you to die!!" Despair started to charge at me. But I knew I couldnt dodge it in time so I ducked and he missed me. I knew that I couldnt keep this up. I had only one choice. I had to use the chrystal. But this would nearly kill me with as little strength as I had at the time But never the less I had to destroy this thing before it hurt anyone else. I touched it and it came out of the broach. Then everyone started to yell at me. they saidnot to use it and that it would kill me but I didnt listen. This was our only chance to kill this creature.  
  
"Its okay! this is the only chance that we have at this it'll be fine!" I still dont think that they believed me but oh well. Despair had turned around and was ready to charge at me again.  
  
"Allright then lets do this. Come for me now!!" He started to charge at me.  
  
I closed my eyes and the chrystal started to glow and just as the demon was about to hit me the chrystal exploded and the demon crashed against the ground and blew up. Then I collapsed.  
  
I didnt remember anything but that I was with the fairies. I obviously had not woken up from the battle with Despair.  
  
"See I told you that you just needed to justify your love to eachother and you would be set free from your problems" a fairy said.  
  
"Yes you were right, but how are you here? this is my dream though."  
  
"We are made of magic. We can do whatever we want."  
  
"Well then can you make me go home?" i asked the blue haired fairy.  
  
"which hom would you like to return to? your present or past?" she asked.  
  
"Is my present life this life?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Then return me there."  
  
"But I thought that you wanted to return to earth? did you not?"  
  
"Well I did but I've changed my mind. I found what I was looking for and all my questions have been answered. I dont need to live in a dream forever."  
  
"As you wish Neo Queen Serenity" the blue haired fairy said and snapped her fingers and I slowly slid out of my dreams to the moon. When I first opened my eyes I saw everyone hovering me.  
  
"Is everything okay?" I asked. Rini hopped on the bed.  
  
"Your okay!" she screeched.  
  
"I'm fine. I just need some sleep. How's Setsuna?"  
  
"I'm just fine thanks to you Your highness. You almost gave your life for me, why is that?" she asked.  
  
"Rini."  
  
"Rini?" she looked at me,puzzled. "Why Rini?"  
  
"She would be sad if I didnt save you. And because your one of us."  
  
"Well now I am in your debt. I owe you something."  
  
"No."  
  
"Yes. You saved my life now I must do something for you. That is my vow."  
  
"But you all have saved me many times. I dont understand, You never wanted me to pay you back." Now I was confused. What was going on here?  
  
"Well you are the princess, no one can replace you. But I, on the other hand can be replaced easily. But in doing so I could go back to Charon" Setsuna said.  
  
"Whats Charon?" I asked.  
  
"The palace on Pluto where I lived before I accepted the duties of gate keeper" she answered.  
  
"Allright everyone, the princess needs her rest now you can see her in the morning when she's well" Serenity interrupted. One by one they all shuffled out of the room, allexcept for Darion, Rini and my mom.  
  
"I'm glad your safe mommy" Rini said. She smiled at me and looked at me with those big and interesting eyes of hers. Then she hopped off the bed and ran out of the room.  
  
"Im glad too Serena. Now you get plenty of rest so you can be ready for the next court meeting" Serenity said. She walked over to the bed side and kissed my forehead and left the room. She shut the door behind her as if she sensed that we wanted to be alone.  
  
"I'm gald your safe and sound too...Serena" Darion said in a soft voice. He pulled up a chair and sat by my side with his elbows on the bed. He looked at me. I could see happiness in his eyes, something that I hadnt seen in a long time.  
  
"Well I'm glad its over and everyone is safe" I said. he put his hand on my face and stroked my cheek.  
  
"Your smiling again, I havent seen you do that in a long time. Not since we left earth" he said.  
  
"And you seem happier than you've been lately. Whats been troubling you?" I asked.  
  
"Well I've had alot on my mind and I've been really busy lately, and I havent seen you much lately."  
  
"I know but we're happy again" I sighed.  
  
"Not all of us" Darion looked away.  
  
"What?"  
  
"It's again, Setsuna."  
  
"Whats wrong now?" I sat up.  
  
"Well you've gotten the demon out of her but not the saddness. It still stains her soul. she has lost her shine somehow. she hides her feelings from everyone and her grief behind her smile. She used to sparkle now that sparkle is out. She looks like she will never be happy again."  
  
"So how can we help her come out of her shell?" I asked.  
  
"With love and friendship. Show her that she has friends that love her. Get her to tell you whats wrong with her then maybe you can help her. But I think its because of lonliness. She's at the gate all the time, by herself."  
  
"I see. So we must show her that we're here for and get her to confess everything then right?"  
  
"Yes that should work. I think its best to use Rini most of all seeing how shes so close to Setsuna and all" Darion suggested.  
  
"I guess your right Darion. But first, I need some sleep" I passed out again.  
  
It was around noon I guess when I woke up because the sun was shining brightly into my room from the open doors of my balcony. The room was empty. I pulled myself out of bed and walked out into the sunshine. The moon looked like earth now, it was green and full of forests and grass and moutains. It was no longer bare and depressing like it was when I had first come to the moon. Everyone was sitting in the garden playing with Rini and they seemed to be smiling, even Setsuna. Shes hiding behind her mask again I thought. A servant walked into my room with some tea.  
  
"Miss would you please go get Lady Setsuna for me?" I asked the servant.  
  
"Yes my lady I will do it right away."  
  
"Tell her that I want to see her alone and to come to my room immediatly."  
  
"As you wish princess" the servant answered and left the room. I walked over to the tea and poured myself a cup but I wasnt really thirsty.  
  
"Blah! green tea again?!" I spit the tea all over the place. "I'm really getting tired of this stuff. It's Setsuna's favorite. I must help her." Shortly after I had cleaned up the mess Pluto walked in.  
  
"You wanted to see me my lady?" she bowed her head slightly.  
  
"Yes. please sit down and have some tea wont you?" I asked. She sat down quietly and poured herself a cup. She stared at it.  
  
"Its green tea" I told her.  
  
"Oh thankyou!" she drank it down. "I'm sure that you didnt sent for me to treat me to a cup of tea" Setsuna said and set her cup down.  
  
"No that is not why I sent for you" I got up and walked to the doors. "How long are you going to stay in your shell?" I asked her.  
  
"What?"  
  
"How long are you planning to hide your saddness from us? your clever smile cant do that forever. Why are you so miserable?"  
  
"Excuse me? what on earth do you mean by that?"  
  
"I can see right through you Setsuna."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Stop hiding your saddness behind you smile. You used to be so happy. You had a twinkle in your sweet smile but it seemed to disappear. Your always sad all the time and yout trying to hide ti from us" I turned to look at her.  
  
"I guess I cant decieve you Serena. You see right through me."  
  
"Whats wrong? please tell me, I might be able to help you" I sat down in front of her at the tea table and stared into her crimson eyes.  
  
"Well it's alot of everything my lady, but mostly lonliness and a lacking space in my heart."  
  
"A lacking space in your heart? what do you mean? what is it in your life that it lacks?"  
  
"Love. I would never know love." She looked at me and I felt as if she was staring through me.  
  
"Theres someone out there for everyone. You just havent found that person yet. But there are people here who care about you and dont want to see you hurt. I'm releasing you from the duty of gate keeper. It seems to be the source of all this pain. You will stay here with us, your family until you feel better."  
  
"But.... being the gate keeper is very important."  
  
"Is this not what you wanted? you said yourself that you didnt want to be the keeper anymore. And now you dont have to. I'm going to help you."  
  
"You call this helping me?!"  
  
"Yes! it will cure your lonliness! because you will be around friends and family constantly! but love you must find on your own!"  
  
"You really believe that there is someone out there for everyone?" she asked.  
  
"Yes I know so. You just have to find that person."  
  
"Oh thank you Serena!" she got up quickly and bowed slightly and ran out of the room and Darion entered.  
  
"well Darion I think this is the start of her new life. Shes no longer the the gate keeper."  
  
"Yes its a beautiful beginning" Darion answered and grabbed my hand and held it tight.  
  
"Right. A new beginning for her and happiness for us."  
  
We did eventually help Setsuna with her problems. Everyone was incredibly understanding with her. I guess she felt that we wouldnt understand. And eventually she found love in a general of the imperial army. So the chapter of Setsuna's saddness and lonliness ended and so does my story, atleadt for now. 


End file.
